아메리칸 조크

An old farmer comes running across field screaming. The farmer's wife was at the kitchen window wondering what the hell was going on. He rushes in house and says, "Ma, get in bed I got a hard on." She slowly gets undressed and gets in bed. He looses his hard on. He gives her a stern lecture, "Next time I come screaming you be in bed ready!" Two months later here he comes screaming across field. ..

A man returns home from work and enters through the kitchen door. He sees his wife on her hands and knees scrubbing the floor. She only has an apron on so the husband gets a big hard on and starts humping his wife doggy style. When he is through he pulls out and at the same time hits her real hard upside her head. "What was that?" the wife screamed. "Here I am being so nice to you, and letting y..

A man called, furious about an Orlando, Florida, vacation package we had booked for him. He was expecting an ocean-view hotel room. I explained that was not possible since Orlando is in the middle of the state. "Don't lie to me," he said. "I looked on the map, and Florida is a very thin state." 우리가 어떤 남자를 위해 예약해 준 플로리다 올랜도 휴가 패키지 여행에 대해 그 남자는 전화를 걸고 화를 내었다. 그는 바다가 보이는 오션뷰 호텔방을 기대하고 있었다. 나는 올랜도는 ..

"I hope you didn't take it personally, Reverend," an embarrassed woman said after a church service, "when my husband walked out during your sermon." "I did find it rather disconcerting," the preacher replied. "It's not a reflection on you, sir," insisted the church goer. "Ralph has been walking in his sleep ever since he was a child." "제 남편이 목사님 설교 중 밖으로 나갔을 때, 너무 감정적으로 받아들이지 마세요, 목사님," 하고 교회의 예..

One day in the great forest a magical frog was walking down to a water hole. This forest was so big that the frog had never seen another animal in all his life. By chance today a bear was chasing after a rabbit to have for dinner. The frog called for the two to stop. The frog said "Because you are the only two animals I have seen, I will grant you both three wishes... Bear, you go first." The be..

Two women are hiking in the woods. After an hour or so, they come to a stream. Unable to cross, they decide to walk along the stream and look for a narrower place. Fortunately they come to a place where they can cross and proceed. Halfway across, one woman stops and says to the other, "I've always wanted to be like the guys, and urinate in a stream." The other woman looks around and says, "well,..

A female secretary was helping her new boss set up his computer and asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in with. Wanting to embarrass his new secretary a bit and let her know where they stood, he smugly told her to enter ‘penis.’ Without blinking or saying a word, she entered the password. She then almost died laughing at the computer’s response: PASSWORD response. NOT ..

A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen." The husband send answer back: "Pour some warm water over them." Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: "The computer is completely fucked now." 어느 추운 겨울 저녁에 어떤 아내가 자기 남편에게 문자 메시지를 보냈다 : "윈도가 얼어붙었어요." 남편이 답을 보냈다 : "그 위로 따뜻한 물을 좀 부어." 얼마 후 남편은 자기 아내로부터 답을 받았다 : "컴퓨터가 이젠 완전히 고장 났어요." [참고] * sms ☞ (휴대폰의) 문자 메시..

There's a student in medical school who wants to specialise in sexual disorders, so he makes arrangements to visit the sexual disorder clinic. The chief doctor is showing him around, discussing cases and the facility, when the student sees a patient masturbating right there in the hallway. "What condition does he have?" the student asks. "He suffers from Seminal Buildup Disorder," the doctor rep..

There is this builder and while working on the building site he drops a hammer on his thumb smashing it. His workmates decide to take him down to hospital to get it seen to. When the guy gets to hospital, he is shown into a cubicle and told to take off all of his clothes. "Why?" says the guy, "It's only my thumb that needs looking at." "Hospital regulations," says the nurse. "But, but," says the..