아메리칸 조크

Sister Mary Ann, who worked for a home health agency, was making her rounds. She was visiting homebound patients when she ran out of gas. As luck would have it, a gas station was just a block away. She walked to the station to borrow a gas can and buy some gas. The attendant told her that the only gas can he owned had been loaned out, but she could wait until it was returned. Since Sister Mary A..

Two blonde engineers were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking at its top. A woman walked by and asked what they were doing. "We're supposed to find the height of this flagpole," said one, "but we don't have a ladder." The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a couple of bolts, and laid the pole down on the ground. Then she took a tape measure from her pocketbook, took a measureme..

A man asks his friend for a cigarette. His friend says, "I think you made a New Year resolution to quit smoking." The man says, "I am in the process of quitting. Right now, I am in the middle of phase one." "What's phase one?" "I've quit buying." 한 남자가 친구에게 담배 한 개비를 달라고 하였다. 그의 친구가 말했다, "넌 새해 결심으로 담배를 끊겠다고 했잖아." 그 남자가 말했다, "난 끊고 있는 과정에 있어. 바로 지금은 내가 중간 단계에 와 있어." "중간 단계가 뭐야?" "담배 안 사기야."

A woman comes to a gynecologist for a checkup. She seems to be very embarrassed and uncomfortable. "Haven't you been examined like this before?" asks the doctor. "Many times," she giggles, "but never by doctor." 어떤 여자가 검사를 받기 위하여 산부인과 의사에게 갔다. 그녀는 매우 부끄러워하고 불편해 보였다. "전에도 이렇게 검사를 받아본 일이 있나요?" 하고 의사가 물었다. "여러 번 있었어요," 하고 그녀는 피식 웃었다, "하지만 의사로부터는 검사를 받은 적이 없어요."

An older man was married to a younger woman. After several years of a very happy marriage, he had a heart attack. The doctor advised him that in order to prolong his life, they should cut out sex. He and his wife discussed the matter and decided that he should sleep in the family room downstairs to save them both from temptation. One night, after several weeks of this, he decided that life witho..

Michael Jackson was announced that he is the proud father of a baby boy. He asked his wife's doctor how soon after the birth could he have sex. The doctor told him he should wait until the kid is at least 12 or 13 years old. 마이클 잭슨은 그가 사내 아기의 자랑스러운 아버지가 되었다는 발표를 들었다. 그는 아내의 의사에게 출생 후 얼마나 있으면 그가 섹스할 수 있느냐고 물었다. 의사가 그에게 아기가 적어도 12살이나 13살 될 때까지 기다려야 한다고 말했다. [참고] * 마이클 잭슨이 의사에게 아기 출생 후 얼마나 있으면 그가 자..

The best three things for being a women are: You can bleed without cutting yourself. You can bury a bone without digging a hole. You can make a man come without calling him. 여자가 되면 가장 좋은 것 세 가지: 당신은 살을 베지 않아도 피를 흘릴 수 있다. 당신은 구멍을 파지 않아도 뼈를 묻을 수 있다. 당신은 남자를 부르지 않고도 그를 오도록 할 수 있다. [참고] * bone ☞ boner, (속어) 발기한 페니스 * "come"에는 "오다"의 뜻 이외에도 (속어로) "사정하다"의 뜻도 있다. 그래서 마지막 영문은 "당신은 남자에게 부탁하지 않아도 남자를 사정시킬 ..

A guy from Glasgow took a vacation to Aberdeen. While there, he met up with a prostitute. After sex, the prostitute said: "￡100 pounds." The guy handed her ￡200. The prostitute responded: "You're so kind." Some days pass, and the guy met up with the same prostitute again and had sex again. The prostitute asked for ￡100, but the guy again says: "No, here's ￡200." The prostitute says: "You're so k..

At 8 years old....you put milk in your glass. At 18 years old....you put beer in your glass. At 80 years old.... you put your teeth in your glass, 8살 때..... 당신은 당신의 유리잔에 우유를 따른다. 18살 때..... 당신은 당신의 유리잔에 맥주를 따른다. 80살 때..... 당신은 당신의 유리잔에 틀니를 넣는다.

A man went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very secluded rural area of the state he lived in. After spending the night, his grandfather prepared breakfast for him consisting of eggs and bacon. He noticed a film like substance on his plate and he questioned his grandfather, "are these plates clean?" His grandfather replied, "Those plates are as clean as cold water can get them, so go on..