아메리칸 조크

The lawyer is standing at the gate to Heaven and St. Peter is listing his sins: 1) Defending a large corporation in a pollution suit where he knew they were guilty. 2) Defending an obviously guilty murderer because the fee was high. 3) Overcharging fees to many clients. 4) Prosecuting an innocent woman because a scapegoat was needed in a controversial case. And the list goes on for quite awhile...

Two guys are talking about their boss's upcoming wedding. One bloke says, "It's ridiculous, he's rich, but he's 95 years old, and she's just 24! What kind of a wedding is that?" The other says, "Well, we have a name for it in my family." "What do you call it?" "We call it a football wedding." The first asks, "What's a football wedding?" The other says, "She's waiting for him to kick off!" 두 남자가 ..

This has to be one of the best singles ads ever printed. It is reported to have been listed in the Atlanta Journal. SINGLE BLACK FEMALE seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. I'm a very good girl who LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods, riding in your pick-up truck, hunting, camping and fishing trips, cosy winter nights lying by the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eati..

A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas. A friend of his said, "I thought she wanted one of those sporty 4-Wheel drive vehicles." "She did," he replied. "But where in the hell was I gonna find a fake Jeep?" 한 남자가 크리스마스 선물로 자기 아내에게 아름다운 다이아몬드 반지를 사 주었다. 그의 친구가 말했다, "자네 부인은 스포티한 사륜구동의 차량을 원했던 것 같아." "마누라는 그랬지," 하고 그가 대답하였다, "하지만 도대체 내가 어디서 가짜 지프차를 찾을 수 있겠나?" [참고] * 아내에게 크리스마스 ..

In a terrible accident at a railroad crossing, a train smashed into a car and pushed it nearly four hundred yards down the track. Though no one was killed, the driver took the train company to court. At the trial, the engineer insisted that he had given the driver ample warning by waving his lantern back and forth for nearly a minute. He even stood and convincingly demonstrated how he'd done it...

Donald MacDonald from the Isle of Skye went to study at an English university and was living in the hall of residence with all the other students there. After he had been there a month, his mother came to visit him. "And how do you find the English students, Donald?" she asked. "Mother," he replied, "they're such terrible, noisy people. The one on that side keeps banging his head on the wall and..

Defendant: Judge, I want you to appoint me another lawyer. Judge: And why is that? Defendant: Because the Public Defender isn't interested in my case. Judge (to Public Defender): Do you have any comments on the defendant's motion? Public Defender: I'm sorry, Your Honor. I wasn't listening. 피고: 판사님, 저에게 다른 변호사를 지정해 주십시오. 판사: 그건 왜 그래요? 피고: 왜냐하면 국선 변호인은 제 사건에 관심이 없습니다. 판사 (국선 변호인에게): 피고의 행동에 무슨 할 말..

There was a job opening in the country's most prestigious law firm and it finally comes down to Robert and Paul. Both graduated magna cum laude from law school. Both come from good families. Both are equally attractive and well-spoken. It's up to the senior partner to choose one, so he takes each aside and asks, "Why did you become a lawyer?" In seconds, he chooses Paul. Baffled, Robert takes Pa..

A man is at the optometrist getting his eyes checked. "You need to stop masturbating so much," the optometrist says. "Why?" asks the man. "Is it going to make me go blind?" The optometrist looks around and says "no, but it's making the other patients very uncomfortable." 어떤 남자가 안과병원에서 눈을 검진받고 있었다. "자위를 그렇게 많이 하지 마세요," 하고 검안사가 말했다. "왜요?" 하고 그 남자가 물었다, "그렇게 하면 내가 장님이 되나요?" 검안사가 주위를 둘러보고 말했다, "아닙니다..

Stuck in a strange city by bad weather, the drinker was bored. He sat in the bar and looking to strike up a conversation, turned to bartender and said, "Hey, about those Democrats in the Congress . . . " "Stop -- I *don't* permit talk about politics in my bar!" interrupted the bartender. A few minutes later the gent tried again, "People say about the Pope . . . " "No religion talk, either," the ..