아메리칸 조크

During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director, 'How do you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized?" "Well," said the Director, "We fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub." "Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger tha..

It was dinner time on a British Airways flight from London to New York. As the flight attendant moved down the plane, she asked one of the passengers, “Would you like dinner?” “What are my choices?” asked the passenger. “Yes or No,” replied the attendant. 런던에서 뉴욕으로 가는 영국 항공에서 저녁 식사 시간이 되었다. 비행 승무원이 비행기 복도를 이동하면서 한 탑승객에게 물었다, "저녁 식사를 하시겠습니까?" "내가 선택할 게 뭐가 있죠?" "Yes나 No입니다," 하고 그 승무원이 대답하였다. [참고] ..

A southern farmer got in his pickup and drove several miles to a neighboring farm and knocked on the farmhouse door. A young boy, about 12, opened the door. "Is yerpa home?" he asked. "No sir, he sure ain't," the boy replied. "He went to town." "Well," said the farmer. "Is yer ma home?" "No, she ain't here either. She went to town with pa." "Well, then, how about yer brother, Joe, is he here?" "..

A preacher, newly called to a small country town, needed to mail a letter. Passing a young boy on the street, the pastor asked where he could find the post office. After getting his answer, the minister thanked the boy and said, “If you’ll come to the community church this evening, you can hear me tell everyone how to get to heaven.” “I don’t know, sir,” the boy replied. “You don’t even know how..

A rather awkward freshman finally got up the nerve to ask a pretty junior for a dance at the homecoming. She gave him the once-over and said, "Sorry, I won't dance with a child." "Please forgive me," responded the underclassman. "I didn't realize you were pregnant." 사교가 다소 미숙한 한 대학 1학년생이 동창회 모임에서 용기를 내어 한 아름다운 3학년생에게 춤을 같이 추자고 청했다. 그녀는 그를 대강 훑어보고 말했다, "미안하지만, 난 아이하고는 춤추고 싶지 않아요." "죄송합니다," 하고 그 하..

An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend. The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring and showed it to him. The old man said, "I don't think you understand, I want something very special." At that Statement, the jeweler went to h..

After being married for 30 years, a wife asked her husband to describe her. He looked at her carefully, then said, "You are A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K." "What does that mean?" she asked suspiciously. He said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous and Hot!" She beamed at him happily and said: "Oh, that's so lovely! But what about I, J and K?" He said, "I'm Just Kidd..

While driving on an empty stretch of highway, two blondes noticed a large flock of birds passing over the highway ahead. "Look up there!" the first blonde exclaimed. "Are those geese flying in formation?" "Probably not," the second one replied. "I'm pretty sure they use pigeons for that." 간선도로의 텅 빈 구간을 운전하던 중, 두 블론드는 커다란 새떼가 앞 간선도로 위를 지나고 있는 걸 보았다. "저 위를 봐!" 하고 첫 번째 블론드가 소리쳤다, "저 기러기들이 대형을 지어 날고..

At a store, a Blonde lady stood in line waiting to pay for her items. Three men stood before her in the line. After 15 minutes she realized that the line wasn't moving at all. She shouted at the cashier, "Is this line going to take all day long?" The cashier replied, "Please step aside ma'am and come here. You are standing behind three mannequins." 어느 상점에서 한 블론드 여자가 물건값을 지급하려고 줄을 서서 기다리고 있었다. 그녀..

A woman who plays cards one night a month with a group of friends was concerned that she always woke up her husband when she came home around 11:30. So she decided to be considerate and not rouse him this time. She undressed in the living room and, purse over arm, tiptoed nude into the bedroom, only to find him sitting up in bed, reading. "Oh No!" he exclaimed. "Did you lose EVERYTHING?!?" 한 달에 ..