아메리칸 조크

Teacher: "Johnny, write a sentence ending with the word hand." Johnny: "My penis in your hand." Teacher: "What?" Johnny: "Sorry teacher, I forgot to put a space between pen is." 선생님: "자니, 단어 핸드로 끝나는 문장을 써봐." 자니: "제 penis가 선생님 손에 있습니다," 선생님: "뭐라고?" 자니: "죄송합니다, 선생님, 제가 pen 과 is 사이에 있는 공간을 잊었습니다."

Four guys were at a deer camp. They had to bunk two to a room. No one wanted to room with Daryl because he snored so badly. They decided it wasn't fair to make one of them stay with him the whole time, so they voted to take turns. The first guy slept in the same cabin as Daryl, and comes to breakfast the next morning with hair a mess and eyes all bloodshot. The other two said: "Man, what happene..

The census taker knocked on Donna's door. She answered all his questions except one. She refused to tell him her age. "But everyone tells their age to the census taker," he said. "Did my next door neighbors, Miss Maisy Hill and Miss Daisy Hill, tell you THEIR ages?" she asked. "Certainly," he replied. "Well, I'm the same age as they are!" she snapped. "As old as the Hills," he wrote on his form...

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?" "HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blonde. "They're watch dogs!" 어떤 여자가 자기의 블론드 친구를 방문하였는데, 그 친구는 두 마리의 새 개를 갖고 있었다, 그러고 그녀에게 그 개들의 이름이 뭐냐고 물었다..

Two Middle East mothers are sitting in a cafe chatting over a plate of tabouli and a pint of goat's milk. The older of the mothers pulls a bag out of her purse and starts flipping through photos. And they start reminiscing. "This is my oldest son Mohammed. He would be 24 years old now." "Yes, I remember him as a baby," says the other mother cheerfully. "He’s a martyr now though," mum confides. "..

Last summer, the President and Mrs. Clinton were vacationing in their home state of Arkansas. On a venture one day, they stopped at a service station to fill up the car with gas. It seemed that the owner of the station was once Hillary's high school love. They exchanged hellos, and went on their way. As they were driving on to their destination, Bill put his arm around Hillary and said, "Well, h..

A Sunday school teacher was teaching her class about the difference between right and wrong. "All right children, let's take another example," she said. "If I were to get into a man's pocket and take his wallet with all his money, what would I be?" Little Johnny raises his hand, and with a confident smile, he blurts out, "You'd be his wife!" 주일 학교 선생님이 반 아이들에게 선과 악의 차이를 가르치고 있었다. "자, 얘들아, 다른 예를 ..

A taxpayer received a strongly worded "second notice" that his taxes were overdue. Hastening to the collector's office, he paid his bill, saying apologetically that he had overlooked the first notice. "Oh," confided the collector with a smile, "we don't send out first notices. We have found that the second notices are more effective." 어느 납세자가 세금이 연체되었다는 강한 어조의 두 번째 통지문을 받았다. 서둘러 세무서로 가서, 그가 첫 번째..

A professor stood before his class of senior organic biology students, about to hand out the final exam. "I want to say that it's been a pleasure teaching you this semester. I know you've all worked extremely hard and many of you are off to medical school after summer. So that no one gets their GPA messed up because they might have been celebrating a bit too much this week, anyone who would like..

Bubba applied for an engineering position at a Lake Charles refinery. A Yankee applied for the same job and both applicants having the same qualifications were asked to take a test by the manager. Upon completion of the test, both men only missed one of the questions. The manager went to Bubba and said: "Thank you for your interest, but we've decided to give the Yankee the job." Bubba asked: "An..