아메리칸 조크

A wife goes on a retreat for work. When she returns, she finds a pair of panties in her dresser that do not belong to her. Furious, she questions her husband. The husband says, "I have no idea where they came from, I don't do the laundry!" So, the wife goes to the maid and questions her. Indignant, the maid replies, "Madam, how should I know? These panties don't belong to me. I don't even wear p..

Completing his examination of the uncommonly well-built, beautiful blonde, the young doctor said solemnly, "You are a very sick young lady. I don't want you returning to work this afternoon. Go home, get undressed and get into bed. Drink about a third of this bottle of medicine I'm preparing for you... it will make you drowsy. I don't want you to answer your phone or let anybody into your apartm..

A third-grade teacher is getting to know her pupils on the first day of school. She turns to one little girl and says, "And what does your daddy do?" The girl replies, "Whatever Mummy tells him to." 어느 3학년 선생님이 수업 첫날에 반 아이들의 가정환경을 알아보고 있었다. 선생님이 한 어린 소녀를 돌아보고 말했다, "그리고 네 아빠는 뭘 하셔?" 소녀가 대답하였다, "엄마가 시키는 것은 뭐든지 하셔요."

At St. Peter's Catholic Church in Toronto , they have weekly husband's marriage seminars. At the session last week, the priest asked Giuseppe, who said he was approaching his 50th wedding anniversary, to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he had managed to stay married to the same woman all these years. Giuseppe replied to the assembled husbands, "Wella, I'va tried to treat her n..

Husband: Knocks the door at midnight. Wife: Go back where you coming from! Husband: Open the door or I throw myself in the swimming pool! Wife: Go ahead and kill yourself, do you think I care? So the husband stands near the dark part of the gate and waits for 2 minutes, takes a big stone and throws it into the swimming pool. !!!!..Scheweew..!!!! Wife hears and opens the door and runs towards the..

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead were trying out for a new NASA experiment on sending women to different planets. First, they called the brunette in and asked her a question. "If you could go to any planet, what planet would you want to go to and why?" After pondering the question she answered, "I would like to go to Mars because it seems so interesting with all the recent news about possible ..

Steve lies dying, as Jack, his law partner of 40 years, sits at his bedside. "Jack, I've got to confess -- I've been sleeping with your wife for 30 years, I'm the father of your daughter, and I've been stealing from the firm for a decade." "Relax," says Jack, "and don't think another thing about it. I'm the one who put arsenic in your martini." 스티브는 누워서 죽어가고 있었고, 40년 동안 그의 법률회사 파트너인 잭이 그의 침대 옆에 ..

A salesman rings the door bell and Little Johnny answers. Salesman: "Can I see your dad?" Johnny: "No, he's in the shower." Salesman: "What about your mother? Can I see her?" Johnny: "Nope. She's in the shower, too." Salesman: "Do you think they'll be out soon?" Johnny: "Doubt it. When my dad asked me for the Vaseline, I gave him super glue instead." 어느 세일즈맨이 도어벨을 울렸다, 그러고 리틀 자니가 응대하였다. 세일즈맨: "네..

"Dad, I don't want to go to school today." said the boy. "Why not, son?" "Well, one of the chickens on the school farm died last week and we had chicken soup for lunch the next day. Then three days ago one of the pigs died and we had roast pork the next day." "But why don't you want to go today?" "Because our English teacher died yesterday!" "아빠, 나 오늘 학교 가기 싫어요." 하고 소년이 말했다. "왜 안 가, 아들아?" "음, 지난..

A new medical facility with several different specialists opened in a trendy part of the city. Wanting to be different and creative, the administration decided that each doctor's office door would, in some way, be representative of his practice. So, when construction was complete, the eye doctor's door had a peep hole, the orthopedist's door had a broken hinge, the psychiatrist's door was painte..