아메리칸 조크

After a day fishing on Lake Michigan, a fisherman is walking from the pier carrying two brown trout in a bucket. He is approached by a Conservation Officer who asks him for his fishing license. The fisherman says to the warden, "I was not fishing and I did not catch these browns, they are my pets. Every day I come down to the water and dump these fish into the water and take them for a walk to t..

A man walks into a bar. "Gimme a double, before the shit hits the fan." A few minutes later, same thing. "Gimme a beer before the shit hits the fan." This goes on for an hour or so. Finally the Bartender goes up to him and says, "Listen buddy, maybe you should pay before you get another drink." "Oops, the shit just hit the fan." He replied. 어떤 남자가 바 안으로 들어왔다. "문제가 터지기 전에 나에게 두 잔을 주세요." 잠시 후, 같은 ..

I provide technical support for the computer software published by my company. One day, over the phone, I was helping a customer install a product on a Macintosh. The procedure required him to delete an old file. On the Mac, there is an icon of a trash can that is used to collect items to be permanently deleted. I told the customer to click on the old file and drag it to the trash. Then I had hi..

There was a papa mole, a momma mole, and a baby mole. They lived in a hole out in the country near a farmhouse. Papa mole poked his head out of the hole and said, "Mmmm, I smell sausage!" Momma mole poked her head outside the hole and said, "Mmmm, I smell pancakes!" Baby mole tried to stick his head outside but couldn't because of the two bigger moles. Baby mole said, "The only thing I smell is ..

Friendship between women: A woman doesn’t come home one night. The next day she tells her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend's house. The husband calls his wife's 10 best friends. None of them know anything about it. Friendship between men: A man doesn’t come home one night. The next day he tells his wife that he had slept over at a friend’s house. The wife calls her husband's 10 be..

Two guys always catch the train to work together; one is French, the other Italian. Every morning when the French guy gets on, he passes his fingers underneath his nose while sniffing and says "Aaahhh... Fifi!" He does this every day, so the Italian guy says to him one morning, "Why do you do that and say 'Aaahhh... Fifi!'?" The French man explaines that Fifi is his wife, and he fingers her ever..

A couple, desperate to conceive a child, went to their priest and asked him to pray for them. "I'm going on a sabbatical to Rome," he replied, "and while I'm there, I'll light a candle for you." When the priest returned three years later, he went to the couple's house and found the wife pregnant, busily attending to two sets of twins. Elated, the priest asked her where her husband was so that he..

A man received the following text from his neighbor: I am so sorry Bob. I've been riddled with guilt and I have to confess. I have been tapping your wife, day and night when you're not around. In fact, more than you. I'm not getting any at home, but that's no excuse. I can no longer live with the guilt and I hope you will accept my sincerest apology with my promise that it won't happen again. Th..

The physical training instructor was drilling a platoon of soldiers. "I want every man to lie on his back, put his legs in the air and move them as though he were riding a bicycle," he explained. "Now begin!" After a few minutes, one of the men stopped. "Why did you stop. Smith?" demanded the officer. "If you please, sir," said Smith, "I'm freewheeling for a while." 체력단련 교관이 한 소대의 병사들을 훈련시키고 있었다..

A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up. After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts. She repeats this gesture about five more times. When she is about to hand him another batch again..